LADY PEAS AND MARTHA JEAN BY GAWD ALFORD’S DIXIE RELISH–OH MY!
Posted July 21st, 2009 by Jill Conner BrowneMama is still firmly lodged in the Very Doorway of Death and is refusing to budge–in EITHER direction. She and God apparently have a Plan but neither of ‘em are sharing clues with the likes of US–so we got her moved to a new and very safe place–while we continue making preparations to move her HOME to our house next week. We have lined up lots of company for her at the new place for this weekend, making it possible for me to actually make a scheduled appearance–for the first time since March 27–and so I’ll be at the Foley Library Fundraiser on Sunday!
YESTERDAY, I managed to accomplish what I considered to be an impressive number of things–given my recent ongoing Mama-induced brain death–WITHOUT THE AID OF EITHER XANAX OR LARGE CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKE (my two drugs of choice during this Stressful Time)–I managed to drive to the REAL Farmer’s Market (not that ridiculous place on the Fairgrounds)–and buy REAL tomatoes, green beans, squash, okra,corn, peaches–AND…TWO BUSHELS OF PRE-SHELLED LADY PEAS!
Lady Peas are my very favorite summer delicacy and they are only available for about 15 minutes once a year–and you can only get ‘em in the South. My dear friend, Queeny TammyKatie from Bakersfield, CA–where they grow just about EVERYTHING in the Universe EXCEPT Lady Peas, eats them 3 meals a day when she comes to visit. We actually call ‘em KATIE PEAS at our house.
There are only two stands left at the Real Farmers Market–Brenda’s on one side and Doris Berry’s on the other. Everybody who shops there is pretty much committed to one or the other: you’re either a Brenda or a Doris Berry and I am sure the choice speaks volumes about our personality and character traits, like an astrological sign–but that’s a subject for another time. Suffice it to say, I am a Doris Berry.
Having been bound and gagged in Mama Hell for so very long, yesterday marked my first visit to the Real Farmers Market this summer but I was greeted with the usual open arms by Doris Berry and her staff. The first thing they wanted to know was, “ARE YOU HERE TO BUY KATIE PEAS?” I said, Lord, yes, and thank GOD I was not too late to get some!
Every year when I’m in line buying multiple bushels of PRE-SHELLED Lady Peas, somebody will invariably ask me “What are they charging for those shelled peas?” and my answer is always the same: I DON’T KNOW AND I DON’T CARE–WHATEVER THEY ARE CHARGING, IT IS WORTH EVERY PENNY–as much as I love me some Lady Peas–I AIN’T SHELLIN’ ‘EM FOR NOBODY, NOT NO WAY, NOT NO HOW!”
So I loaded up with all my fresh veggies–and, still UNMEDICATED in any way–brought them home and not only cooked a veritable FEAST for me, TCBITW and Bailey–I put up one of them bushels of Lady Peas in the freezer, for future consumption–perhaps at Katie’s next MOST ANTICIPATED visit, after the LONG-AWAITED birth of EVIL STEWIE, who has been cooking in her own personal oven for what seems like FOR-EVER!
We sat down and, like three fat locusts, devoured everything in sight–if there is anything BETTER than homecooked FRESH veggies, I just don’t know what it could be. UNLESS–along with them homecooked fresh veggies–one is also lucky enough to have a BIG JAR OF MARTHA JEAN BY GAWD ALFORD’S HOMEMADE DIXIE RELISH–which, of course, WE WERE SO FORTUNATE TO HAVE ON HAND. I swear, we ate til we liked to fell over in a faint and it was purely a blessin’!
Today, God willing, I will put up that other bushel of peas and who knows what else I might manage to get done–it appears I’m on some kind of roll! I might even run the VACUUM! Although that seems a Fool’s Errand. Granted, the dog and cat hair IS in 3 foot drifts around the house–but it’s not like the animals will STOP shedding, just because I finally managed to clear a path through the piles. No, I’ll prolly make more custard for Mama–who calls it her “goody,” and wait to vacuum until RIGHT BEFORE Allen and Jeffrey pull into the driveway on Friday.
And, of course, I’ll consume any and all leftovers from last night–with the remains of the Dixie Relish!
20 Responses to “LADY PEAS AND MARTHA JEAN BY GAWD ALFORD’S DIXIE RELISH–OH MY!”
July 21st, 2009 at 7:52 am
Oh LADY PEAS! SO PERFECT for the QUEEN! Even if you did have to cook them yourself, they are worth it, aren’t they?? I am going to see myveryown sick grandmother whom I so love and is in hospice down in Aberdeen, and the treat of it is, Mama made some LADY PEAS! YAY! I will probably cry and eat LADY PEAS. What a combo! A virtual therapeutic soul cleansing of joy. Hope YOUR Mama does as good as she can do and YAY! for HRH JILL getting to be out and about for a little bit..tis good for your soul!
July 21st, 2009 at 8:19 am
How do you find the time to keep us updated? You are amazing and an inspiration! I would’ve given in to the chocolate shake temptation at least. Don’t you just L.O.V.E. that MJbyGodAlford? She brought her BEST EVER batch of gumbo and lots of jelly to us at the beach house last week and I actually licked a plate and the photo has lovingly been posted on facebook. What a fun, kind person she is.
Hope your mother doesn’t suffer. Hard as it is to let them go, we have to. Much love.
July 21st, 2009 at 8:42 am
I LOVE Lady Peas, too! Yum, yum, yum!
July 21st, 2009 at 9:45 am
Bless your heart! Remember food can be cathartic and I hope the lady peas helped satisfy! I wish you strength and love during this tough time, as your books got me through tough times too! Much love!
July 21st, 2009 at 9:51 am
Jill I’m so glad you’ve been able to get out a little. And yes you’re right, nothing is better than home grown fresh veggies, no metter whether you get em at the real Farmers Market, or you grow em yourself. I personally have garden, planted and worked by my very own “cbitw”, and I’m thinking I’m gonna go cut some okra and fry it up this afternoon. MMMM MMMMM!
July 21st, 2009 at 2:08 pm
Jill, just relax and know that God is in control and enjoy every minute your Mom is here. Mine died when I ws 21 and at 58 that is a long time to remember a great lady and a wonderful cook. Momma thought macaroni and cheese was a yellow vegetable bless her heart. An Italian neighbor of ours at our lake house at Possum Knigdom Lake ( real name no kidding) owned several restaurants in Dallas and boated over a big galvanized bucket of fresh snails one morning. As soon as he left momma went to the boat house and dumped them in the lake. She stated “Lord Beverly Ann, those people actually eat what I step on in the Garden.” That was my momma…Oh, I miss her still
July 21st, 2009 at 3:57 pm
I know what you mean–I lost my Daddy when I was 30 and he was only 62. Never gets any easier–we’ve missed so MUCH together! Love the snail story–xxooj.
July 21st, 2009 at 5:15 pm
HRHJCB: Bless your heart – it’s not an easy time… so glad that you found your lady peas. Laughed out loud at the mention of Martha Jean By Gawd Alford…what an awesome lady. Sending you and Mommer angels…
mjb
July 21st, 2009 at 7:01 pm
Cornbread! PLEASE tell me you had cornbread — and NOT that boxedJiffysugared-up stuff! REAL cornbread out of an iron skillet with lots and lots of REAL butter. My mouth’s a’waterin’ just talkin’ ’bout it! Love to you and Mama!
July 22nd, 2009 at 7:18 am
Well, cornbread is just IMPLIED, of course!
July 22nd, 2009 at 9:49 am
HHAHAHAHA!! Is that not the best stuff??!! Mr. Bill threatens me if I give it away, but Cheryl and Jill get a jar from every batch!! Glad you enjoyed it and I’ll have you more real soon.
July 23rd, 2009 at 7:03 am
Yeah–LIKE SUNDAY, I HOPE! And Jeffrey wants his OWN RATION OF JAMS from now on–HE EATS IT OUT OF THE JAR WITH A SPOON–cannot even bother with toast or biscuits!
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:19 pm
Growing up with a grandmother from Mississippi, we had these a lot. ‘Course she called ‘em cream peas. She’d put up bunches of ‘em for the winter. They were always on the table with new potatoes in cream gravey, meatloaf and cornbread sticks. The tea was so thick with sugar, it stood about 2″ in the bottom of the pitcher. Thanks for a wonderful memory!
Debbie
July 26th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
i am a yankee, but hope am not considered a damn yankee as both myself and my mother married southern men and i know how to cook okra so it is not slimy and corn bread without sugar in it.
Have never heard of lady peas. what are they? we do like balck eyed peas here at chez kelley but i guess they are different from lady peas.
July 26th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Note to self – no jelly at parade – I need RELISH!
July 27th, 2009 at 9:17 am
HRH Jill, we thoroughly enjoyed your bestowing us with a visit in LA (lower Alabama). My sister Wendy is so excited, she could just pop. She is coming next year to Jackson, come hail or high water, and we have you to thank! I think she is going to have a picture of herself in her new red hairs and glasses and tiara on her blog. Thanks again for a wonderful day visiting with you and TCBITW. Hugs, kisses, Bonnie
July 28th, 2009 at 1:58 pm
Just registered my chapter–I was just wondering if I could get some parade info, i.e. the date, etc. Thanks!
July 30th, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Sudi–Congrats on the new chapter and welcome to the Queendom! New Parade info will be posted under PARADE on the website–soon–as soon as I can get it done which will prolly be next week, the way things are going. All you need to do right now is get your HILTON ROOMS–601-957-2800 Talk to Billie Burns–he is DA MAN and he looooves his Queens!
Had a GREAT time in LA–even without Martha Jean–and now I get to threaten her with everything, including excommunication which is soooo much fun! It was great to see so many Queens there–and to meet so many Virgins, too–and the Barefoot was excellent, as always! I’m STILL EATING CUPCAKES, by the way! xxooj.
August 2nd, 2009 at 10:07 pm
I’ma wondering if Doris would ship Lady Peas to Oregon. I’ll take all the bushels she has left. Jesse (brother ) was here for a visit and we talked about Lady Peas for 1 hour. Funny how many people will do just about anything for some Lady Peas. It is my favorite food.
August 3rd, 2009 at 6:16 pm
mouth. clamped. SHUT.